“Emotional Intelligence plays an important role in a well-balanced and productive workplace, as well as in leadership development.” Allan Schwever

To define the ideal leader, many would emphasize traits such as intelligence, toughness, determination, and vision. But the key attribute that distinguishes outstanding performers from those who are merely adequate is called “emotional intelligence.”

There are five components to emotional intelligence. All five traits sound desirable to just about everyone. But organizations too often implicitly discourage their people from developing them.

1. Self-awareness.

Emotional intelligence begins with this quality. People with a high degree of self-awareness know their weaknesses and aren’t afraid to talk about them. People who assess themselves honestly – that is, self-aware people – are well suited to do the same for the organizations they run. Self-awareness means having a deep understanding of one’s emotions, strengths, weaknesses, needs, and drives. People with strong self-awareness are neither overly critical nor unrealistically hopeful. Rather, they are honest – with themselves and with others. Thus a self-aware person who knows that tight deadlines bring out the worst in him plans his time carefully and gets his work done well in advance.

2. Self-regulation.

This attribute flows from self-awareness, but runs in a different direction. People with this trait are able to control their impulses or even channel them for good purposes. Self-regulation, which is like an ongoing inner conversation, is the component of emotional intelligence that frees us from being prisoners of our feelings. People engaged in such a conversation feel bad moods and emotional impulses just as everyone else does, but they find ways to control them and even to channel them in useful ways. The signs of emotional self-regulation, therefore, are not hard to miss: a propensity for reflection and thoughtfulness; comfort with ambiguity and change; and integrity – an ability to say no to impulsive urges.

Like self-awareness, self-regulation often does not get its due. People who can master their emotions are sometimes seen as cold fish – their considered responses are taken as a lack of passion.

3. Motivation.

A passion for achievement for its own sake—not simply the ability to respond to whatever incentives a company offers—is the kind of motivation that is essential for leadership. If there is one trait that virtually all effective leaders have, it is motivation. They are driven to achieve beyond expectations – their own and everyone else’s. The key word here is achieve. Plenty of people are motivated by external factors such as a big salary or the status that comes from having an impressive title or being part of a prestigious company. It’s not difficult to understand how and why a motivation to achieve translates into strong leadership. If you set the performance bar high for yourself, you will do the same for the organization when you are in a position to do so. And of course, optimism and organizational commitment are fundamental to leadership – just try to imagine running a company without them.

4. Empathy.

In addition to self-management skills, emotional intelligence requires a facility for dealing with others. And that starts with empathy—taking into account the feelings of others when making decisions— as opposed to taking on everyone’s troubles. Of all the dimensions of emotional intelligence, empathy is the most easily recognized. We have all felt the empathy of a sensitive teacher or friend; we have all been struck by its absence in an unfeeling coach or boss. But when it comes to business, we rarely hear people praised, let alone rewarded, for their empathy. The very word seems no businesslike, out of place amid the tough realities of the marketplace. Empathy is particularly important today as a component of leadership for at least three reasons: the increasing use of teams; the rapid pace of globalization; and the growing need to retain talent. But leaders with empathy do more than sympathize with people around them: they use their knowledge to improve their companies in subtle but important ways.

5. Social skill.

All the preceding traits culminate in this fifth one: the ability to build rapport with others, to get them to cooperate, to move them in a direction you desire. Managers who simply try to be sociable— while lacking the other components of emotional intelligence—are likely to fail. Social skill, by contrast, is friendliness with a purpose. The first three components of emotional intelligence are all self-management skills. The last two, empathy and social skill, concerns a person’s ability to manage relationships with others. As a component of emotional intelligence, social skill is not as simple as it sounds. It’s not just a matter of friendliness, although people with high levels of social skill are rarely mean-spirited. Social skill, rather, is friendliness with a purpose: moving people in the direction you desire, whether that’s agreement on a new marketing strategy or enthusiasm about a new product.

Extended practice, feedback from colleagues, and your own enthusiasm for making the change are essential to becoming an effective leader. It is fortunate, then, that emotional intelligence can be learned. The process is not easy. It takes time and, most of all, commitment. But the benefits that come from having a well-developed emotional intelligence, both for the individual and for the organization, make it worth the effort.

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